How do you deal with difficult conversations?
- What’s the matter with you?
- My point of view and my guess of what the other side is thinking.
- Comparison of views: Identify differences and similarities and adjust them for the conversation.
- Try a neutral outside view – How would a moderator see it?
- What is my interest? What am I talking about?
- What might be the interest of the other side?
- Who does the situation help and how?
- What emotions resonate with me when I think of this thing? (Loud feelings)
- What’s underneath? What need on my side is not met and what do I need to have it met?
Structured conduct of the interview
- Warm up, clarification of the procedure
- Exchange of views
- Which emotions/needs are hurt?
- Explanation of mutual interests, needs, (probably also demands…)
- What does it take to restore a working relationship?
- Negotiate a solution
- Completion by “checkpoints”